J is for Jealous
by The O.C. Addict
Summary: Namine is jealous and just can't seem to find the right song. AU [Slightly one sided RoxasxNamine]


_**Disclaimer: **Do I seem like a person to own anything other then this stupid story?_

_**Author's Note: **Um . . . this is a random story I made. :) It has no point actually I just really needed something to write. And this is what came out in that time-span of 30 minutes_

_**Warning: **AU. Plus teenage whining. (Turn back if you can.)_

_**Summary: **Namine is jealous and just can't seem to find the right song._

_**Rating: **K+_

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There's nothing. 

Nothing could possibly help me at this moment. There's just nothing.

Now I know what you're probably thinking. You're probably thinking I'm suicidal or something. That I think my life sucks.

Well, I'm not in that situation . . . Entirely. First of all, I'm not suicidal. Although I probably should be cause this problem sucks so bad. Second of all, No one knows what I'm going through. I've asked all the people I could that could've possibly helped, and you know what they gave me? Nothing. Nothing but those stupid sympathy looks that's a mix between 'I'm sorry you're dog died' and 'You're sad and pathetic'.

And you know what? They're right! I am sad and pathetic. So seriously, no one knows what I'm going through.

Millions of people around the world have probably gone through something similar situations, but not exactly like what I'm going through.

This is the most stupidest thing to ever happen to me. And I can't help but not think about it.

You're probably rolling your eyes and thinking 'Oh my god. Will this girl ever stop whining?'. And you know what the answer to that is?

No. I won't quit whining. Because you know why?

It's because I'm jealous.

You're probably thinking 'Jealous? That's nothing.' But trust me it is. I'm jealous of the stupidest thing ever. But I'm a teenage girl who's hormones are in overdrive. Cut me a little slack.

And now you're thinking of I'm jealous of right? It's easy, and when I tell you you'll laugh. Trust me you will.

I'm jealous of this girl.

There. See? I told you! I told you that you'd laugh.

And why exactly am I jealous of this girl? It's because she has the one thing that I've been wanting for the past 3 years.

Now your mind is flickering past the many things that I could possibly want. Lots of possibilities aren't there?

**STOP.**

She can have all those things that you were thinking of. I just want the thing that money can't buy. Well . . . actually with some it can but that's just really nasty.

You wanna know what she has that brings tears to my eyes everytime I think about it?

Roxas.

She has Roxas.

That's right. You can laugh you're head off now. I'm jealous over a guy. Typical right?

**WRONG.**

This is not you're normal teenage situation. Well . . . it could be on a level. Indeed it is. But it's also very different.

Know why?

Because I've never experienced anything like this before and it's freaking me out. I mean of course I've been jealous. Duh. It's just I've never been jealous like this. For no reason.

Well, obviously being jealous over a guy is something. It is. Trust me I know. It's just that it's stupid.

And I can't control it. It was just sprung upon me too.

Seriously.

I didn't even know I liked him until I found out that he had a girlfriend. My friend Olette was telling me that I was just in denial. I liked him but never wanted to admit it. Of course I used to like him a few years back but I just figured that those feelings went away. But I'm guessing they didn't.

You wanna know who is girlfriend is? It's Kairi.

Kairi! Can you believe it? Just a few weeks ago she was with Axel, a senior who is like man whore.

Now she's with Roxas!

Now I can't even eat my lunch in peace cause I sit just a few tables away from her and when Roxas gets done with his lunch he goes and sits with her. And everytime he does I jump up and dump my tray in a hurry and storm out. No one ever notices except for Olette who tries to comfort me everytime I get upset about it. Alas, of course it doesn't work.

Now I know you just think I'm whining about this. Don't worry I also think I'm too. I just hate the fact that I'm freaking out everyday about this.

Olette just keeps telling me that I need to just go up to him and talk to him. Which sounds like a good idea. For anybody but me.

i don't talk to a lot of people. Roxas being one of them.

I mean there is the occasional word because we are in the same class and it's not a very big.

And you wanna know something else? I think he really really likes her. Because in Bio the other day I saw him writing her a note. And he never writes notes to anybody.

What's a girl to do? I've got nothing. I know he doesn't like me at all. So there's no hope for that.

I'm trying my best to hate her, but I haven't been so successful in that because the stupid whore is so nice.

And to top it off I can't find a good song to ever fit my mood when I come home. You know, a good I hate you/die/love me song. Know any? If so please tell me. I need one desperately.

So tell me. Would you say that this reason is a good motive for suicide? I'm in love with a guy that knows I exist but just doesn't like me in that way and probably never will. After all this isn't the movies. He won't just magically wake up one day and find that I'm amazingly beautiful and fall in love with me.

But oh, how I wish he would.

Because no matter what happens, I'll be here. Waiting.

Just waiting for him to possibly look in my direction.

See? I told you that my situation was like no other. Well . . . Maybe it was just a tad bit like others. But I bet those people could find the right song to drown their sorrows.

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_What'd you think? Stupid right? Well . . . I didn't know what to right and I only did it in like 30 minutes. Stupid choice._

_Anywho. **Please REVIEW**. And If you can actually find a song like that PLEASE without a doubt tell me. I'm in dire need of one:)_


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